Today I went to the hospital to get my yearly for-visa physical. It's always a hassle and this year was no exception. The clinic (hospital is a bit formal) only sees patients - foreign passport holders wanting residence in China and Chinese holders seeking visas to go abroad - from 8 - 10:30am. Crowded is an understatment.
9:28 - I arrive by taxi to long lines in the lobby. A nurse directs me to the 4th floor, where foriegners are handled. The line actually begins on the stairs of 2nd floor. I wait.
9:45 - I can see the 4th floor, and a nice Aussie woman saves my spot so I can grab a medical form and fill it out.
9:55 - I'm on the 4th floor. Only 14 people separate me from from the first clinic office. They told me not to eat before the test, so I skipped breakfast. Hunger sets in.
10:10 - Inside the clinic office now. It's more like a waiting room with the queue snaking around the walls. At least there are chairs to sit on. Tables to fill out forms are in the middle and one long table with computers posts up on the left wall. Here, 3 clerks assign everyone a sheet of labels to code our samples and to enter us into the computer network.
10:15 - Finally sitting down. Still 14 people to go before I actually make progress on my application. To the Aussie woman, I offer my condolences over her loss: Steve Irwin, Croc Hunter, dead at 44. I break it to her gently. Is that a tear? Wait, no, dust blown in through the open window got her eye. Clinics are clean here... right?
10:20 - Pounding at her keyboard and instructing me to look into the webcam, a nurse enters my information into her computer. She gives me 8 stickers with my name & serial number.
10:22 - Elapsed time with nurse: 2 min. Back in line. Standing. Now I pay for the services I haven't recieved yet. In China, you often pay for things and then get what you paid for. NOT like in the States where you recieve services and pay for what you get. Slight difference, but it's a big one...
10:30 - I've paid $43.45 for the service and have a reciept to prove it! Back in another line. Time spent with clerk: 1 min. Hunger = pain. Pain = frustration.
10:33 - See a hot Russian girl. Song, "Don't You Wish Your Girlfriend Was Hot Like Me" gets stuck in my head. I wish I had a girlfriend, and that she was hot, like the Russian girl. She sees I'm wearing my CCCP zip jacket. She smiles. Wait! She's got a sister, too! Wait! She's also got a really tall (bigger than me) boyfriend with her. Deuce!
10:40 - Still in line. Still have "hot like me..." repeating in my head. Her boyfriend would crush me. At least I'm already at the hospital.
10:45 - A nurse realizes that the lines are too long. Ya think?!? Pulling 14 of us aside, she directs us to parts 2,3,4 of the check-up. Things move quickly now.
10:50 - ECG. Four suction cups are strapped to my chest, looking at my guts and monitoring pulse. Know what she WON'T find in there? Food. I'm starving.
10:55 - At the general health room. Questionarre would be a better word for it than 'check up.' A doctor asks me if my vision is ok, what my height and weight are. He checks my blood pressure and my heart rate. He smiles and I'm done.
11:00 - The X Ray machine is like a bad ride at the MN State Fair. Standing on a platform, the nurse pulls a lead apron over my waist and fastens it to the otherside like a restraining belt. Whurring, the machine moves up and down and side to side pausing at each point for a quick 'click.' Thank you. I'm done!
11:05 - Back in line. Now I've got to turn the form in to the main office along with a photo. There are 14 people in front of me. A different group than before.
11:26 - I'm all done... well mostly. The results will take 2 days to process, so I've got to return back then. Next time, I'm bringing a breakfast AND lunch with me.
Being that this is the only clinic in Beijing to do this kind of work, you'd think they'd try to streamline the process. Unfortunatly, I didn't see a comment box. Then again, don't believe I've seen one anywhere in China...
Sorry if this long tale of bueracracy bored you. If it did, then perhaps my point was made. In all, the ordeal took me 2 hours - only about 15 of which was actually spent with a 'professional'. Next time you visit the doctor's office, while you sit in a clean room listening to Kenny G and reading Golfer's Digest, please think of me... and just how lucky you are.
peace. paul.
Tuesday, September 05, 2006
Saturday, September 02, 2006
Road Work - Nan Luogu Xiang Hutong, Beijing
"Preserve the style of the ancient capital / everybody has responsibility"
Road work on the hutong streets... making them wider. Good - because now they'll be even and more astetically appealing. Bad - because that means more car traffic and slightly less character.
peace. paul.
Road work on the hutong streets... making them wider. Good - because now they'll be even and more astetically appealing. Bad - because that means more car traffic and slightly less character.
peace. paul.
Back to Blogging, Beijing style
Truly inspired by my good friend jeremy's voyage to Taiwan, I've decided that it's finally time to put down the China Daily and pick up with my blog. To that end, I'll give a quick update on my life and times here in the capital of China, Beijing.
My days have oscillated between relaxing and ridiculous since I've returned to China after a wonderful 3 week stay in the US. I've been waking up early and getting everything lined up for my student visa (my current one expires in 3 weeks, so no rush). However, every time that I make an inch of progress, they tell me I have another yard to go.
Yesterday I showed up at the Public Security Bureau. That's the police station. They handle visas and visa extensions. Interesting. With my passport and university invitations in hand, I thought everything was in line. I had no idea. As it would happen, I need these documents, plus a form from my local PSB as proof of residence, plus a medical form telling them I'm healthy and don't have leperacy, plus another sheet from my uni (which they can only give me after I've completed the afformentioned 2 steps). The plot thickens.
So, I ask the PSB clerk, "Where do I get the physical." (BTW: I've had one every year I've been in China... if only they worried about their own citizens' health as much as foreign immigrants'.) She tells me the clinic name, and the phone number to get directions. I turn to leave. "But," she said, "the clinic is only open from 8-10:30am, so you'll have to wait until Monday." Great, a brick wall. I'll wait until Monday. I call my landlord about the local PSB visit.
My landlord is a very fast talker. Mustering the best Chinese I can, I call her and explain the situation, "To live in China, I must get visa. For visa, you and me go to police to tell them I in Beijing live. You can help me when?" Then she starts talking really quickly in Chinese, "I can... but then... 7 day... maybe we can... ok?" What?!? Sheepishly, I say ok, thank her and hang up. No idea what it all means. It will take 7 days to process? In 7 days she can go with me? Totally lost.
My friend Jeff speaks Chinese very well. I ask him if he wants to get some lunch. A clever ploy... After lunch, I enlist Jeff to translate and figure out what she means. Apparantly, she said that she knows where the office is and that it will take 7 MINUTES, not days to complete. Relief sets in. We schedule a time this weekend when she can take me. One form pending, 2 more to go...
Seeing as I couldn't really do much more work on my visa, I sat down with 2 of the greatest movies of all time: Rocky III and Rocky IV. That's right, Clubber Lang AND Ivan Drago, back to back. Watching Rocky fight Drago and Soviet bureaucracy with his fists, I felt peaceful. It was a good ending to a frustrating day.
More to come... hopefully shorter posts too...
be well. peace. paul.
My days have oscillated between relaxing and ridiculous since I've returned to China after a wonderful 3 week stay in the US. I've been waking up early and getting everything lined up for my student visa (my current one expires in 3 weeks, so no rush). However, every time that I make an inch of progress, they tell me I have another yard to go.
Yesterday I showed up at the Public Security Bureau. That's the police station. They handle visas and visa extensions. Interesting. With my passport and university invitations in hand, I thought everything was in line. I had no idea. As it would happen, I need these documents, plus a form from my local PSB as proof of residence, plus a medical form telling them I'm healthy and don't have leperacy, plus another sheet from my uni (which they can only give me after I've completed the afformentioned 2 steps). The plot thickens.
So, I ask the PSB clerk, "Where do I get the physical." (BTW: I've had one every year I've been in China... if only they worried about their own citizens' health as much as foreign immigrants'.) She tells me the clinic name, and the phone number to get directions. I turn to leave. "But," she said, "the clinic is only open from 8-10:30am, so you'll have to wait until Monday." Great, a brick wall. I'll wait until Monday. I call my landlord about the local PSB visit.
My landlord is a very fast talker. Mustering the best Chinese I can, I call her and explain the situation, "To live in China, I must get visa. For visa, you and me go to police to tell them I in Beijing live. You can help me when?" Then she starts talking really quickly in Chinese, "I can... but then... 7 day... maybe we can... ok?" What?!? Sheepishly, I say ok, thank her and hang up. No idea what it all means. It will take 7 days to process? In 7 days she can go with me? Totally lost.
My friend Jeff speaks Chinese very well. I ask him if he wants to get some lunch. A clever ploy... After lunch, I enlist Jeff to translate and figure out what she means. Apparantly, she said that she knows where the office is and that it will take 7 MINUTES, not days to complete. Relief sets in. We schedule a time this weekend when she can take me. One form pending, 2 more to go...
Seeing as I couldn't really do much more work on my visa, I sat down with 2 of the greatest movies of all time: Rocky III and Rocky IV. That's right, Clubber Lang AND Ivan Drago, back to back. Watching Rocky fight Drago and Soviet bureaucracy with his fists, I felt peaceful. It was a good ending to a frustrating day.
More to come... hopefully shorter posts too...
be well. peace. paul.
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